My Dearest...
First off, i just wanted to say how comforting it is to know how many other people have shared their unhappy stories with this site, it's nice to know that other people have problems and get as frustrated with life as i do.
As for my story, a pretty standard one involving a girl and me. It all started about 8 years ago when one of my internet friends introduced me to her cousin because of both of our shared interests in books and writing, so we started emailing and getting on well. Very shortly afterwards, my friend who introduced us died, this hit me hard and made me think that perhaps something unimaginable must have sent her into my life just to introduce me to her cousin. Anyways...time went on and this girl who i was introduced to got on with me very well and we became best of friends despite her living in Canada and me in England. I have always felt close to Canada considering my half Canadian blood, my frequent visits and my fondness of the country in general. So we talked lots and lots and lots, and the more we talked, the more i just wanted to meet her, hug her, help her and be a part of her life. My 18th birthday came and i had never been so miserable, drinking bottles of whiskey everyday and just wanting nothing but a life with her, my family were worried about me. So i saved up and on my 18th, instead of spending it with friends, or even family, i travelled to Canada. Although i greatly suspected she had feelings for me and i had them for her, it was a bit of a taboo subject and so fearing looking like an obsessed crazy englishman, i never actually arranged to meet her on that trip, just being close to where she lived made me feel a little more whole, yet such regret do i feel for that trip since i subsequently found out she had been shopping very close to me. So i came back home, and we kept on talking online, but i was noticing through things she said, that she was beginning to have the same feeling as me. But in the end reality snatched her away, she had friends she saw everyday, university to go to, and many other social things that i couldn't play a part in and the inevitable happened, she started dating guys. This hurt, really hurt, to me our years of conversing and building a relationship was destroyed, i wanted to feel happy for her, but by this time i had nothing else on my mind but ending up with her. I make me out to sound like the victim, but there was no victim, that is life. i still now and again send her notes, but they're very brief and not at all heartfelt. My plan is to one day, just fly out there just to meet her once (because i still haven't met her in person), just to hug her and thank her for helping me in the past and thank her for being her, then, being as satisfied as fate will let me be, end my misery which is life. She made me, and broke me, i guess i am just a weak person. even if no-one reads this, it's nice to tell my story, because i have never told anyone about her or my relationship with her, all the people around me think internet romances are doomed, but i have never felt as happy as i did when our relationship was in its prime. Thanks for reading this, i hope as many people as possible find true happiness and embrace it for those of us who don't find it.
Rori.
Story shared: 09/01/2007 17:32:39
Comments
Anyway, thanks for posting.. aint heard a simlar story to mine to date
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