No Way Out
In high school I dreaded non uniform days at school, everyone would be dressed in nice fashionable clothes but I had to wear strange coloured cardigans and polka dot shorts because my mum wouldn't let me wear anything else. I always got picked on and laughed at because of it and my friends rarely wanted to be seen with me. My mum has always been a control freak so when I met my boyfriend 3 years ago I was happy at the idea of a break away from her and I moved in with him and his family when I was 17. Things were great when at the start, I got on great with his family, I had a job i enjoyed and for once I got on with my mum. The past year though things have gone very downhill. As me and him started getting more serious and talking about the future I realised me and him couldn't want more different things in life. Ok we agree on marriage and kids but he would rather live the rest of his life with his parents, where he doesn't have to pay bills and a mortgage. He is happy going the same holiday destination year in year out. He has no ambition or drive for life whereas I want the most out of life I can get. He is jealous and possessive as well which is making things even harder for me. Its not as simple as moving out though because my mum won't have me back. She gives my brother and sister all the love and attention and I get little. If I don't see her for weeks she won't ring to see if I'm ok. My friends don't have time for me anymore and this man I've got a major crush on is married with kids and I can't get him off my mind. I've got no job, I had to quit my last 1 because a guy there reminded me too much of someone from a horrible childhood experience I had. Recently my boyfriends sister has been making my life miserable with her jealousy of our relationship but no one will listen to how I feel and think.I feel so trapped and alone with no way out and I don't know what to do.
Story shared: 22/12/2006 19:50:48
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