broken winged- paint it all black
well here agein m17(now 18)uk well still here just hating more and more things about me my life and other ppl i have now been getting very very agresive with ppl and more soo with females and i think its that i have figered out i will be alone forever lost in my dark life of drink tears and hate working my job ( as a trolly boy ) i have lost all self asteam sick of ppl ( mostily ppl my own age or a little older or younger ) looking at me like dirt or a joke laghing at me or making sly jabs and well iam geting to the point where iam cuting my self off from ppl apart from 1 or 2 i have also started going out late at night drunk and pissed off or upset and started just doing silly things smaching things up or cars or finding some way of making myself feel better and well i dont know what i will do next seeing girls in the store i look up seeing how good and pretty cute bonnie they look and then with in 1sec i relise iam nothing why would they even look at me after 12months of that you start feeling diffrent darker i guess and not wanted or needed and well loved only ever felt loved when i was about 14 and she was my angel but well she got older and well very very good looking and well as you guessed she when for the bigger better looking lads and well i was a ghost iam not mad at her i want her happy even if i have nothing to do with her and well i would trade the rest of my life for one day where i feel loved and needed and wanted going out and seeing good looking cuples making me wanna go and well i know this will sound sick and wrd but like cut up there faces let them feel what its like to be seen as dirt unloved and unwanted
Story shared: 10/08/2008 00:06:03
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